CHAPTER LXXXVI

Lee Invades Pennsylvania

1.  Now after all the armies had been quiet for many days, and the people began to inquire, one of another,  What meaneth this great silence.

2.  Behold, there came a rumor that Lee had crossed over the River Potomac into the borders of the land of Maryland, and of the land of Pennsylvania.

3.  And great far fell upon the people, and upon the President, and the governors an the captains, and the horsemen, and the foot-soldiers.

4.  An people gathered together at the corners of streets, and in all manner of places, and did frighten one another with horrible reports.

5.  And said, Who knoweth but that these Rebels will put us all to the edge of the sword, and consume our substance, and destroy our habitations, and eat up our children, and dig the bones of the pilgrim fathers from their graves, and burn them?

6.  Who knoweth what city shall first fall into their hands, whether Harrisburg, or Philadelphia, or Washington, or New York or Boston?

7.  Happy is Henry Ward, who saileth over the ocean, for surely would be speedily perish by the hands of these Rebels.

8.  Woe now unto Horace, and Wendell, and Cheer, and woe unto those who write for the "Atlantic."

9.  Woe unto the Priests of the "New York Independent," and unto all who preach the doctrines of Emancipation.

10.  Thus cried the people in their fright and in their great consternation, but the Copperheads rejoiced and were glad, for they loved the Rebels.

11.  And John Bull laughed a mighty laugh, and thought, Surely the signs of the times are bright, for if the Rebels shall begin to prevail over Jonathan, then will I do as Louis hath advised, and go to fight with the Yankees.

12.  But not until the danger is well nigh passed will I go, for I have no pleasure in thoughts of a battle with Jonathan.

CHAPTER LXXXVII

The Call for Militia

1.  When Abraham knew that the Rebels drew nigh unto the cities of the North, he straightway wrote an edict,

2.  Calling upon the people that they should send forth men to the defense of the Nation.

3.  And the number of souls that Abraham desired was one hundred thousand, who should hasten with all speed to repel the invader.

4.  From the land of Maryland ten thousand, and the land of West Virginia ten thousand, and from the land of Ohio thirty thousand, and from the land of Pennsylvania fifty thousand.

5.  And Abraham declared that these should be mustered forthwith into the army, and be armed, and equipped, and prepared for battle in not time, and serve for six months in volunteer service.

6.  And on the same day that Abraham sent forth his edict, so also did the Ruler of the tribes of Pennsylvania send forth his edict, so also did David, who was Ruler of the tribes of Ohio, send forth his edict, and so also did many others send forth their edicts.

7.  Furthermore, Abraham said, Surely things can not prosper unless the Chief Captain of the Army of the Potomac is changed, for lo! it hath been more than a week since my servant Hooker hath been Chief Captain.

8.  So Abraham caused Meade to be Chief Captain in the place of Joe, whose surname is Hooker.

9.  And it was heralded to and fro in the land that Meade had been made Chief Captain over the great Army.

10.  Now when the people read in the Dailies that Abraham had made Meade to be Chief Captain, they said, Who is this man, and whence cometh he?  Verily, we know not the name?

11.  But when they read the pretty sayings that Meade had written when he became Chief Captain, and knew the modesty of his words, and that he boasted not as Joe had boasted,

12.  They said, Peradventure, he will do much better than Joe--and if he do not, verily he will not do less than George.

13.  So they were satisfied, and all men prophesied that Meade should do mighty works, and peradventure, drive the Rebels out with great slaughter, and free the tribes of the land of Pennsylvania, and of the land of Maryland, from devastation and from rain.

CHAPTER LXXXVIII

The K. G. C.

1.  When it had been commanded by Abraham, and by the great Sanhedrim, that a great conscription should take place, and that officers should go about and enroll the names of the young men of the land,

2.  Both those that had taken to themselves wives, and those who had not yet come to the years of wisdom and discretion, but had reached a certain age.

3.  Behold, many banded themselves together, saying, We will not give our names to these men, and we will not enroll ourselves in the army of the North.

4.  So they went about to kill those who had been appointed to enroll the names of the young men.

5.  An some they slew secretly, and others they fell upon with a mighty power, and with great numbers, and murdered.

6.  Now they who had thus banded themselves together call themselves Knights, even Knights of the Golden Circle, and they said, We will not serve our country, nor respect the laws thereof.

7.  Now the Knights of the Golden Circle were of the race of Copperheads, and of the tribes of the meanest Butternuts.

8  And they dwelt in the low places of the South of the land of Hoofers, which is called the Pocket.

9.  And in the darkness of Egypt, which is in the South, of the land of the Suckers,

10.  And in divers provinces and towns, where whiskey aboundeth, and the light of knowledge hath not dawned.

11.  Now there was one Oliver, whose surname was Morton, who was Chief Ruler of the land of the Hoosiers.

12.  And Oliver was a just man, and ruled his people wisely, and loved God, and eschewed the Butternuts.

13.  And a great feud arose between Oliver and the Knights, and it came to pass that Oliver's wrath was kindled against the Knights, and he caused many of them to be seized and dealt with according to their sins.

14.  And Lewis, also, who is called Wallace, sought after the Knights, that he might slay the, for Lewis was not to be fooled with.

15.  And Burnside, also continued after this vicious people, like unto a stick that is sharpened; and it came to pass that the Copperheads entered into their holes, and the Knights became scattered.

CHAPTER LXXXIX

Good Works

1.  It came to pass that, when many of the soldiers of the Armies of the North had sickened of divers, diseases, or were prostrated from the wounds which they received in battle.

2.  So that the Hospitals were filled with the suffering, and the pestilence walked in the midst of the camps,

3.  The people of the North gathered themselves together in meetings and counselled one with another, divising how they should give comfort unto their brethren who suffered.

4.  And they called these meetings, "Soldiers' Aid Meetings," because they were held for the good of those who suffered in war.

5.  Now the Soldiers' Aid Societies grew and multiplied exceedingly, and were establish in every village and town and city of the land.

6.  And they collected together provisions of all kinds, and soft clothing and bandages to bind up wounds, and healing salves to anoint the sores of the wounded.

7.  All these things they sent forth to the camps, and the fields of battle, and the hospitals, and to whatsoever places the sufferers were.

8.  Moreover, they sent books that the soldiers might read, and papers to gladden their hearts, and many letters full of glad tidings from home, and of cheerful sayings.

9.  Now foremost in all good works were the churches, for they remembered the teachings of Him who went about to do good.

10.  And many who before had reviled the churches, saying, "they are filled with hypocrisy and all manner of sin, and inclined kindly unto them, and forgot their former bitterness.

11.  For they saw that the churches followed after the true spirit of righteousness, and did those works of goodness and brotherly love, which the Scriptures commandeth.

12.  But none of the works of love that were done were like unto the toils of the women, for they ceased not night nor day to do deeds of compassion and patience.

13.  And men said, Behold the marvellous works of love that woman hath done.  Let us speak her name with reverence, and let her character be lifted up in the Nation.

CHAPTER XC

Speculation

1.  Now great multitudes departed from the worship of the true God, and fell down and worshipped Mammon.

2.  And some offered up unto this false God, Honor, and Conscience, and Good Faith, and Country.

3.  And many waxed rich, even on the sorrows of the people, and did coin gold, even from the blood of the soldier.

4.  And many who were in high places sought how they might receive great gain, by the selling of honor.

5.  And the temple of Mammon was set up, even in the midst of the Capitol City, and the statue of Mammon rose above the statue of Liberty, which standeth on the dome of the Capitol.

6.  And the great Rulers said, Behold, are not all corrupt, and shall we not also become corrupt,--are we better than other men, or why should we forbear to do sin for the sake of a mere name.

7.  So it came to pass that the Rulers were corrupted by their own evil thoughts, and they are who were ruled were corrupted by their masters.

8.  For the Rulers are the head of the fountain, and the People are the stream, and if the head of the fountain is corrupt, how shall the stream be pure?

9.  Give ear, oh! Extortioners, and all ye who buy that ye may sell again, and greatly multiply your profits.

10.  For the day cometh when your ill-gotten gain shall perish out of your hands, and the sweetness of the cup of richness shall be bitter as the apples of Sodom.

11.  For the eye of Justice sleepeth not, and the ear of God heareth the secret bargain that ye make in the cunning of your deceit.

12.  The blood of the slain cryeth to Heaven from the field of battle, and the moan of the hungry pierceth the ear of the Just One.

13.  Rejoice in fruit of your falsehood, and buy wine with the wealth ye have stolen, but hope not for visits from Angels, or sweet meditations with Heaven.

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